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Top Five Bizarre Moments at Championship Parades

Sports provide entertainment. Drunk athletes provide even better entertainment.



San Francisco Rally thong
San Francisco Rally thong

The San Francisco Giants’ Rally Thong. Photo Credit: Ryan Bjorkquist

Athletes are like rock stars in that they both like to party. Winning a championship is an achievement to celebrate. Sometimes, these athletes drink a little too much, which can make them unpredictable. The spontaneous acts they perform usually gives the fans something to remember. Here are my top five bizarre and unexpected moments from various championship parades.

5. Goalies drop the F-bomb: The Los Angeles Kings were ecstatic after they took home the 2012 Stanley Cup. Kings goalie Jonathan Quick was proud of his team. He also wanted to fire up the crowd. At the championship rally in the Staples Center, Quick said, “How about this f****** team. How about these f****** guys.”

Corey Crawford chose to take it one step further at this year’s championship rally for the Chicago Blackhawks. After Patrick Kane handed him the team’s championship belt, Crawford walked up to the mic. Crawford shouted, “F***** right Chicago!  Biggest beauties in the league, f***** worked their nuts off for this trophy. Woooo! No one will ever take this away from us! We’re the champs!”

4. Never let go of the trophy: I guess soccer players only use their feet for life as well. Actually, I’m surprised this does not happen more. Real Madrid just won the Copa del Rey. Real Madrid’s Sergio Ramos was holding the trophy high above his head during the parade. He was wrong to guy for that task. Ramos dropped the trophy, and it fell in front of the bus. Somehow, the trophy did not get damaged when it was run over by the team’s bus. Local police snatched up the trophy, and handed it to the bus driver.

3. Mark Madsen’s Dance: Who could forget Madsen’s horrid dance moves? The Mad Dog was asked to dance, and then told to “Go back into your cage,” afterwards.

2. Troy Polamalu Crowd Surfs: Not a wise move on Polamalu’s part. It was more like a “trust fall” because he was putting a lot of faith in those Steelers fans. 

1. Aubrey Huff’s Rally Thong: Aubrey Huff’s “Zoolander” tribute was the most bizarre championship parade moment in history. First California had the rally monkey with the Anaheim Angels, now the San Francisco Giants bring out the rally thong. Honestly, did anyone see this coming?

John Bean just completed his junior at the University of Missouri, and expects to graduate in May 2014. John is a journalism major, and is also working on a business minor. He grew up near Chicago, and hopes to become a sportswriter someday. To answer everyone’s question, he prefers the White Sox over the Cubs. John is currently an intern for