Today’s Hate List! is sponsored by Harriet Tubman. She is one of the many reasons that black people can consider themselves American citizens today. Through her many courageous efforts black people were introduced to the premise of freedom. We live in a society which takes tomorrow for granted. Nothing is promised, so we should appreciate our civil liberties which tomorrow may not be here. We as American citizens owe a great debt of gratitude to this extraordinary woman. How do we show our gratitude to Ms. Harriet Tubman, we ignore Harriet Tubman day on March 10th and celebrity the life of Biggie Smalls aka Notorious B.I.G on March 9th. Every black radio station across the country plays his music on March 9. On that day you can hear a Biggie song anytime of the day. The following day you hear nothing about Harriet Tubman. March 10th is the day that she passed away. Don’t get me wrongwe’ll always love Big Poppa, but I truly fail to see what his music did for me and my quest for freedom. So with that said. I HATE ALL OF US DUMBASS M. F”s for giving praise to Biggie and not Harriet Tubman. We truly should be ashamed of ourselves. Here’s the Hate List!
1. I hate Facebook socialites. These are the people that take pictures everywhere they go. You look at their pictures and see how much fun they are pretending to have. Sometimes the pictures are taken at a Great party with hundreds of people in the background. Other times they are at a wackass party with two people in the background. Random pictures range from Pool Party’s, Black Party’s, White Party’s and the infamous Birthday party which has some elaborate flyer with douche bag graphic designs. I hate you Facebook socialite. Now let’s see how many of my fake friends delete me after reading this. “Facebook! the place where you can fake being happy.”
2. Staying on the topic of Facebook, I hate the restraining order that my ex has on me. At least with Facebook, I can see how she is doing. Even if she has her page blocked, I can go through someone else’s page to get to her. I can send her friend invites and attach a message to let her know, that someday we will be together again. All this is done within the letter of the law.. I love you Ty.
3. I hate parents who curse at their children like they are adults or violators of human existence. I just want to walk up to them and tell them, “I am about to piss in my hand then slap the shit out of you”.
4. I hate when I play Russian Roulette with my gas tank. When I see it close to E, sometimes I tell myself on the inside to stop and get gas, but the gambler in me goes for the gusto. And other times it has me praying to God in a tight situation. “Please God let me make it to a gas station, I trust that you will help me.” Then God just says, “dummy I cut on the gas light. DuhHHH!”
5. I hate eating red meat. Thats why I’s only dates Blacks mens and Whites mens. “DON’T JUDGE ME HONEY”
6. I hate myself for calling off work one day to catch my girlfriend cheating.. I found myself following her in my buddy’s car. She drove to the south part of town and parked outside this small house. So I parked a block away and quietly crept around the side of the house. I began to peek through the window, the first sight I saw was her undressing. As the tears rolled down my face blurring my vision, I caught a glimpse a naked man and his artillery. It was at this point I started to bang on the window yelling, ” Don’t You Put That In Her”. It looked like a Night Stick.. WTF! I can’t compete.
7. I hate the guy who Ben New That. This is the asshole who tells you that he ben new that when you are giving information. You: Hey Kobe and Lebron was talking about teaming up with each other. Ben New That replies: Man! I ben new that! I also hate that woman that always has to tell you, ” could na been me” or would na been me”.
8. I hate the person at the supermarket that has one item and chooses to take the bar or stick or divider or whatever it is.. to separate their one dumbass item from my dumbass item. Like I am really going to make a mistake and pay for your shit.
9. I hate that because of my sarcasm, I’ve learned how to take a punch.
10. I hate that I can’t tell men with long hair from women and women with short hair from men.. I hate that in our society I really can’t tell men from women anymore.