The Most Hated

The Hate List: Mickey D’s True Hollywood Story

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Today’s Hate List is coming to you from my thoughts on Domestic Violence.  This traumatic experience leaves many homes torn, children confused about their love towards there parents, and many people dead.  I hate domestic violence.  I am not a fan of men bringing harm to  women.  And I hate even more women who lie about a man putting their hands on them.  The domestic violence is just a bad thing in all communities.  Except in the gay community, as it applies to men.  Is it domestic violence if two gay men get into an argument and start fighting?  I think not!   That shi! right there, IT IS JUST A FIGHT.  One dude beating another dudes ass is a fight.  And the one that got his ass whipped, who is calling the police telling them that his boyfriend is beating on him should get a response from the operator which goes as follows, “Your Punkass Better Fight Back!”  There is not such thing as domestic violence between two gay men.  It falls in to the category of  two grown ass men FIGHTING!  And remember in all fights someone has to lose so F” it.  I hate the idea of domestic violence between to gay men. I hate the idea of a man who is getting beat up on a regular basis going back  to his lover because he fears him.  That is some punk ass punk ass!  Don’t forget, even if you love playing butt darts, you are a man first. Fight back!  Here is the Hate list!

1. I hate the one time when  my son told me that he knew how to spell.  Being that he is just learning how to read, I was impressed, so I asked him what he knew how to spell. He told that he knew how to spell the word laugh. I told him to spell it. He said L…..O…..L.  I look at him, then I looked calmly to my left, towards my fake studio audience. Then back towards him. I told him that he will not ruin my family name with that dumb shit, now hold your head in shame.  Noooo….. I did not do that.  I just chose to lol internally. Then I sent him to his room under the staircase.

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2. I hate undergraduate four year colleges and universities for making me waste my money.  These establishments will have you confused and indecisive about your future.  Then after 9 changes to your major and 167 credits, you graduate, just to find out that your undergrad degree does not matter.  You and can get into  grad school with any major. And once you are there you have to start all over again.  This is some bullshit. To all the undecided students of the world, go for Liberal Arts as a major. E-Z

3.  I hate that the one guarantee in life is : when you find a box of cigarettes on the ground it is usually empty.   Oh yeah, you are born and you die blah, blah, blah.

4. Here is another installment of the Homeless Wars. I hate the homeless man that walked up to me while I was coughing and asked me,”hey man are you OK, I see you coughing a lot, is your AIDS acting up?” As everyone one the bus stop laughed  he slowly walked away waving a peace sign.  I wanted to push his shopping cart over.

5.  I hate the warm-up pants with the buttons on the side. You know the ones that athletes can pull off right before they get in the game. I hate them even more when I see my mother in a pair. I can just imagine her yelling, ” put me in the game coach” then running to the scores table and snatching those pants off.

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6.  I hate that I sometimes have Republican views.  Why? because it makes sense sometimes.

7. I hate the white man that told me to go back to Mexico because I shared the same complexion as some of the  Hispanics I  work with.  I simply stated, “F@(K you”.  He in turn replied, you wetback, lettuces and beans picking sum of a bitch. I walked over to him and looked him dead in the eyes and said, “look that was some racist shi!, now my people have accepted being called Nigger. It falls into the many terms of endearment for us. I would prefer if you called me that.  He thought about it then changed his mind.  And I am thankful he did. He would have F’d me up. He was big as shi! Cause ya’ll know I would have had to punch his him in the mouth if he call me nigger. Ok, let me take my fake Hispanic ass back to work.. “Alejandro! put my paint bucket down!”

8.  I hate when people slurp their food or chew with their mouth open. I also hate people who make noise when they eat. Hmm, ahhh, grrrrr. You greedy bastard just eat and shut the hell up.  As for the  slurp sound it sounds  like…never mind.  I just hate it.

9. I hate Ronald McDonald for going solo on that ass and keeping it still the same.  If you remember Ronald had a whole crew.  Until he Beyonce’d their ass. He had Birdie, Grimace, Fry kids, Hamburglar, Mayor Mccheese, Officer Big Mac, etc.  Here is the Mickey D’s True Hollywood story.  The whole crew was getting their shine, but Ronald wanted more.  He wanted to be a mega star.  Grimace began to draw a lot of attention. Kids loved him.  Not so much of Ronald, mainly because clowns are creepy and Ronald is one creepy looking clown.  So when Grimace was offered a job to host a kid’s show, Ronald became piss.  Once Grimace left the group with no ill will towards anyone, he soon found out the the show went in a different direction.  They hired a purple dinosaur name Barney.  This sent Grimace into a world of depression.  He tried to rejoin the McDonald’s group but was not able to.  With Ronald not allowing Grimace back in the group, everything turned up side down.  All the members of the crew were fired except the the hamburglar, but he fell into a life of drugs and had numerous visits to different correctional facilities.  Birdie became a prostitute.  She and Mayor Mccheese were wrapped up in a McDonald’s land scandal.  The fry kids lost there cuteness as they aged and became Fry Men. Officer Big Mac was indicted for misappropriation of funds for the McDonald’s land police union retirement fund.  All because of Ronald punk ass. F” Ronald McDonald punk ass. Baptize him in Monkey shi!

10.  I have to share this. Ryan Russillo stated on The Scott Van Pelt show. (Parenthetical Citation You won’t get me) He hates over weigh people with handicap tags in their cars.  because the only reason that they have them is because they are over weigh.  I have to agree.

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Tell me what you hate! The Hate List is open to you

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Bryan Stewart
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