9 Smooth Ways to Ask Someone Out on a First Date

TUT Staff
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Does the idea of asking someone out pushes you into a state of complete frenzy? Fortunately, you’re not alone. Many of us are the helpless victims of the first-date panic. Of course, this panic is fueled by the possibility of rejection. But you have to give it your best shot anyway! As Wayne Gretzky perfectly put it, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”

The best way to overcome this anxiety is by planning something thoughtful and fabulous. Lucky for you, we have summarised our favorite ways to ask someone out on a first date. 

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1. Look for shared interests

Find common ground between you and your crush. Do you both love cats? Are both of you dedicated Strictly Come Dancing fans? Use this shared interest to initiate a conversation and take it from there.

2. Ask at the right time

For the best odds, try to find the right time to ask someone out. Did they just go through a breakup?

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Though it might seem like the perfect opportunity to swoop in, our only advice is- DON’T. Even though you probably have good intentions, it doesn’t transpire that way. It’s insensitive to use someone’s emotional vulnerability to score a date. 

3. Keep it casual

Use a relaxed approach to ask out someone. A formal sit-down dinner can be too intense for some people. If you’re not sure what the other person likes, go with something you know well. You can grab a coffee or visit a museum. Our personal favorite is a walk in a park, which can start some interesting conversations.

4. Find their personal interests

If you’re completely clueless about the person you’re attracted to, put your social media to work. Some harmless social stalking is a way to learn about their personal interests. However, we advise you to avoid digging too deep and appearing creepy instead of thoughtful. No one wants to go on a date with Joe Goldberg from the Netflix series You.

5. Think out of the box

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Instead of the usual movie or dinner, think of a unique date idea. Ask your crush on a date that they would least expect. We suggest going to the Hot Wheels Monster Truck Live.

6. Go on a double date or a group outing

A one-on-one date puts too much pressure on both parties and often ends up being more awkward than romantic. To skip the awkwardness and get straight to the fun part, ask them to join you for a group hang. All of you can meet up for a drink at the pub or go to a bowling alley.

If you think a group outing won’t accurately express your feelings, ask them on a double date. It’s more intimate and to the point.  

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7. Slide into the DMs

A lot of us, especially millennials and Gen Z, feel the dread of asking someone out in real life. There’s nothing wrong with asking someone over text or DMs. Actually, many people prefer it.

8. Get a wingman/woman

Remember, in middle school when a friend would ask out a boy on your behalf? That move is still very much applicable. 

Do you think you and your crush are better than birds of a feather but don’t have the courage to ask them? Let your friend establish a middle ground and help you out.

9. Be respectful

There is nothing more unattractive than a person who can’t take rejection maturely. If the person refuses your offer, then respect their decision and move on. Never make the mistake of pestering someone to go on a date with you. That’s just rude and unacceptable.

Here’s blowing some pixie dust in your direction and wishing you the best of luck. Shoot your shot!

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