Black. Blacker. Blackest. President Obama has been in office for two terms and it is now coming to an end. He has unified black people in ways that no other president has. President Obama always managed to keep a cool head and just when we thought that he had immense restraint- he blessed us with these uber black gems!
Here are the top 5 blackest moments from our favorite president.
*Disclaimer* Grab your mugs because the white tears will be abundant on this post. *cackles*
5. President Obama said “Fuck running the country! Me and Wifey have a date.”
In May 2009, he had been in office for four months and clearly something was amiss. The “Prez” needed some q.t. with his fashionable cutie, First Lady Michelle. He picked bae up in his jet where they flew to Manhattan for a Broadway show and dinner. This is THE blackest date night ever. They’re dressed in all black, they’re black AND he called into work to hang with his boo. All this date needed was some pork skins and hot sauce. Oh and a glass of red kool-aid. In a glass- of course… because they are CLASSY.
4. That one time when he told Congress to “Help a brother out!” and to “Stop Hating!”
Apparently, President Obama had had enough of Congress’ shenanigans and foolery and he made no qualms about it in while delivering his speech in July 2014. It was shady and funny but I’ll be damned if it wasn’t true. He said it like he was somebody’s fine ass uncle trying to get that hookup in the worst way. *Insert Master P soundbite for “I Got The Hookup”*. Congress still dragged their punk asses on many of the issues on HIS agenda but his tone and choice of words let those idiots know… “I see you.”
Ugggggggghh na na na na!
3. He brushes that shit off and quotes raps in his speeches.
As the executive in chief, President Obama is known for being eloquent. He is probably one of the most thrilling orators of our time. However, that didn’t stop him from blessing the mic with Jay Z’s lyrics. I bet he said the curse words too. Can you imagine our Prez dropping an f-bomb over a hot 16? I wonder if he “Milly Rocks” on every block? Judging by the way he is brushing that shit off in this photo, I bet he makes the ONLY stank face when he two steps.
2. President Obama wasn’t having any interruptions while his game was on.
Black daddies don’t play that. You can’t mess with them while their game is on. President Obama is no exception. I am almost certain that he wanted to pull off his belt to whoop the asses of everyone who criticized him for not leaving Cuba after Belgium was bombed. Given Belgium’s horrific history of oppressing Africans, I didn’t need him to jump and do anything. Give it up for that moment of silence when you realize that your president sonned the shit out of any naysayers addressing HIS business! I can see it now. Prez was straight sipping on a mojito or Havana Club void of any kind fucks until his game was over. Now, sitcho five dolla ass down before I make change.
1. He sings Al Green with his cool ass.
The top blackest moment from President Obama’s presidency- HANDS DOWN- has to be him singing “Let’s Stay Together” by Reverend Al Green at the Apollo Theatre in 2012. It, simply, doesn’t get any blacker than this. Grab your lawn chairs, some cards for the Spades game, find some meat to put on the grill, get your Newports and chill the Colt 45 because it’s about to go DOWN. Do you hear me? Chicago has rubbed off on him for real. This is some family reunion shit.. I was waiting for him and the First Lady to start Chicago stepping and he, totally,wears flip flops and socks.
These moments made his term a little to easier to bear. Between police brutality and racists coming out of the closet left and right, we needed, this time, to be in our own space with one another… doing what we do best. Living life.
You can’t outdo black people.
K. Araújo, a native Detroiter, is a cross between Claire Huxtable, Rosie Pérez and Millie Jackson. Widow, bruja, Oni Yemaya, palera, professional dragger of filth and Mami to the dopest Ethiopian EVER, she is the Editor in Chief of “Negra With Tumbao”, Staff Writer for “The Urban Twist” and a freelance contributor for major publications like The Root, VSB, Huffington Post, My Brown Baby and The Glow Up. She has been known to shake what her mama gave her, is the hell and high water, an expert salsera and cussologist with a penchant for the finer things in life and is and forever shall be- unapologetically black.