A Black Woman Takes Extreme Measures To Discuss White Privilege
Opinion

I Don’t Tip White Servers

White privilege is very real, so why does it take an extreme statement like “I don’t tip White servers” to get White society to listen to a Black woman talk about it?

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  • Laura Diamodnstone

    Wow. So glad to “see”/”hear” you. We missed you! You got the entire spectrum of classic racism – fragility, colorblindness, “reverse” racism, and hate speech with your post. Thank you for your lessons and bravery!

    • Joshua A Smith

      So whining is bravery now huh?

  • RocketSparkle

    Yes GIRL YET! What a fabulous social experiment to really make people examine their privilege and visceral response to “white unfairness” while black death goes unchecked.

    • ghost

      Black deaths go unchecked? If anything its the complete opposite now. If a black person dies in police custody it is investigated by the department it happened in and the feds now, which is great because their deaths should be investigated. To say you aren’t going to tip someone solely based on the color or their skin is just plain racist and isn’t right. If I as a white person said I wasn’t going to tip any black server this same woman would call me racist. Servers, black or white, depend on the tips they receive so if you don’t want to tip go to McDonald’s or Burger King where they are actually paid to wait on you. Most servers get $4.75 plus tips, would this lady wait on someone she knew wasn’t going to tip for less than minimum wage? I highly doubt it, and I wouldn’t expect any servers at the restaurant I work at to wait on someone who they know for a fact won’t tip them. Receiving a tip as a white server is not “white privilege” because guess what, you are expected to tip your black server the same amount you would tip a white server. If you want to start a conversation about white privilege why not bring up the fact that a white person with a criminal record is more likely to be hired than a black man with a clean record? Or if this lady wants to end the stereotype that black people don’t tip maybe she should prove people wrong and TIP, otherwise it makes the stereotype appear real. I hope she requests only black servers when she goes out to eat.

      • Patrick Clark

        Actually I can’t, I live in a predominantly Hispanic neighborhood and I’m white with a lot of tattoos so I get stopped by the cops often. They assume I’m there trying to score dope, or up to no good. Same with the stores. Because of how I look, I’m always being watched or followed by the store worker. I’m telling you white privilege is an imaginary concept. Sure there are privileged white people, just as there are privileged minorities. There’s many factors regarding treatment, where you live, how you look, how you act, etc. If you’re a black guy wearing baggy clothing and a doo rag, or ball cap in a white neighborhood, you’re going to get that treatment. Same as I get in a Hispanic neighborhood. If you’re a black guy wearing a suit, you’re not going to be treated as the gangster guy. It’s a simple fact.

        • Just because you don’t see it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.It’s kind of like saying, I’ve never been raped, so no women get raped.

          • Patrick Clark

            Really? Nice analogy asshat. I know rape exists and I didn’t have to be raped to know that. There’s documented proof, convictions, video evidence, etc. Any white person who is of average means, or not wealthy doesn’t acknowledge the existence of “white privilege”. Wealth is the only thing that affords one privilege, not being white. I don’t see it, that alone debunks it. I’m white and it’s called “white privilege”, that tells you that all white people are privileged. I don’t know any privileged white people, the ines I do know of, are well off, or wealthy. Just like the privileged black folks, they are privileged because of their wealth. “White privilege” is the same as Santa Claus or the Tooth fairy. Saying white people are privileged is like saying black people don’t tip. It’s a ridiculous stereotype at best. Are there privileged white people, yes, does that mean all white people are privileged, absolutely not. There are privileged people of all ethnicities, not just white. You know what gives them that privilege? Wealth.

          • stardreamer42

            You say you get stopped by the police all the time. What you DON’T get is beaten up on the street, arrested, tasered, and have your life threatened. THAT is white privilege, whether you want to believe it or not. You get to walk away because you’re white.

          • lovelydestruction

            Wtf your crazy

          • Patrick Clark

            Yup, I’m crazy and your(you’re) illiterate. Have a great day!

        • Heather T

          Re: “Suit”:

          So THAT’S Trump’s secret…..

        • Warrior KM

          I get what you are saying regarding how you are treated because of your tattoos and such. But it seems that you are not aware of the countless times that it has been proven that even black men in suits and who drive nice cars and live in nice neighborhoods get treated as though they are no different than thugs by the police.

          • Patrick Clark

            I’m not denying that happens, it’s profiling not “white privilege”. Yes the cops need retraining and whatever else it takes to change their tactics. It could be racism, prejudice, bigotry, etc., but white privilege it’s not. It’s similar to how I get stopped by cops for being the wrong color in the wrong neighborhood except I’m not in a suit. But somehow people are so convinced of the existence of “white privilege”, they’re saying that’s privilege only for the simple reason that I’m not beaten to a pulp? People are ignorant and can easily be led by news and media reports. There are statistical facts to support the contrary. The liberal media thrives on sensationalism and hyperbole, and racism, blacks being shot by police, BLM rallies, etc. all create hype and panic amongst the sheep. The 13 yr old that just got killed by police was a national story and the facts of the case slowly started coming out. Not at first though, that he robbed someone with a gun(bb), and ran, then allegedly pulled the gun out. There’s almost always a justified reason for the killing or shooting. That needs to change though, with less than lethal force. The white kid in CA who got killed by police, and he was unarmed and didn’t really give them a reason to shoot him, that story barely made local news. The point is that if the individual is black, it makes better news and creates sensationalism and race baits. The media is divisive and they try to create a dichotomy between races to create tension. Nobody getting killed is good, especially by cops, especially when it could’ve been prevented. The only people who acknowledge the existence of “white privilege” are the liberal left, SJW’s, and BLM. You won’t hear any legitimate organizations or whites who will acknowledge it. If there was empirical evidence or it was an axiom, then how could it be denied?

          • Warrior KM

            Which in your view are considered legitimate organizations that specifically denounced BLM & SJM?

            You and I agree on most items. Which is why we fight every day to raise awareness about the brainwashing of the masses via the left and right propaganda tools funded by the Rothschilds, Soros as well as White Nationalists and huge Corporations who also have a vested interest in keeping the mass population divided.

            But I will not deny the system that is put in place hundreds of years ago and that remains in place in their attempt to keep the masses divided. The system of White Privilege is part of it that same fabric that our nation was built upon.

            Additionally, by default, profiling is part of the system of White Privilege. YOU are not responsible for the systems in place, so hopefully you are not feeling the guilt that many associate with it. What you as a human being who stands for humanity is responsible for is acknowledging the systems and fighting against them through continually educating yourself and others around you.

          • Heather T

            Re: “Guilt”:
            I am positive that it’s only white people who’ve insisted that it’s “guilt” which motivates me to say the things I do. And have tried to make me feel guilty for feeling an emotion that they only assumed I was feeling in the first place.

            And as if “guilt” is the only emotion one can feel when confronted with the pain one’s own group has caused. Guilt is the least of it. There’s horror, and there is anger and there is heartbreak….and then there is action. To me, emotions are useless without it.

          • Warrior KM

            Indeed, Heather. And when white people accuse other white people who fight for justice with having, “white guilt” I believe that this is their method of projecting their own guilt. Which; guilt should not be there in the first place unless they personally have inflicted injustice on someone.

            From their own manufactured guilt (regurgitated in hate-media that targets rural and poorer-white class), they justify defending the oppressors. <—which THEN gives them a reason to feel the guilt that they should feel. They can easily stand up and fight for what is right; even if there are some ignorant and prejudiced black people who don't want their help or alliance. DO IT ANYWAY because its the right thing to do. Because the hateful and ignorant black people are few; they are simply the loudest.

          • Heather T

            Yes, but it depends on who’s making that distinction. One person’s “hateful black person” is another person’s “agitator”.

          • Heather T

            Yes, but it depends on who’s making that distinction. One person’s “hateful black person” is another person’s “agitator”.

            And it is never “easy” to stand up and fight for what is right. I know that you know this. Being right doesn’t always feel as good as people seem to think it does. It can feel sh***y and lonely and like you don’t belong sometimes.

            And if a particular marginalized person neither wants nor needs my help or alliance, I am certainly obliged to step back and shut up while they do it **their** way.

          • Patrick Clark

            I don’t know about any groups in specific that denounce BLM, and it’s not BLM in general that is all bad. They do have a legitimate cause and certain aspects of the group protest in a peaceful, and meaningful way. It’s the crooked and racist members that are the divisive ones. Members like DeRay McKesson, Yusra Khogali, Shaun King, et al, they are as racist as what they assert whites are. They say racist, racially insensitive, bigoted, divisive, and just plain ignorant things, and blacks believe that bullshit. An organization that has the civil rights of its people at heart isn’t necessarily a bad thing, especially when done in a positive, knowledgeable, informative way. Their goal should be to inform the public of the supposed injustices that affect black and minority groups, not create a dichotomy, be divisive, and generate millions of dollars for its core members. That just reeks of scam, and people need to be aware of these activities and not just buy their garbage at face value. Like I said, there seems to be a rash of killing of black individuals and it seems that the cops shoot innocent black people for no reason, which isn’t the case. The media likes to disseminate and sensationalize these incidents because they thrive on sensationalism and race baiting. More whites are killed by police than blacks, but you don’t hear about those because it doesn’t cause hysteria and panic like minority killings do. If it’s a problem then it needs to be addressed, one thing is for sure, the police need retraining and to be taught not to use their guns as a first line of defense, or action. Life is precious no matter what color you are, and killing someone for making a stupid decision or not complying is excessive for sure.

          • Warrior KM

            Your last two sentences are exactly what Shaun King’s message is. I’m not here to compare the brutality of races. Factually, by percentage, black people have been the number one target. Our country is founded upon that very fabric. If you don’t see at least that, then I’m not sure what else we would need to engage about. You are on the money, regarding media sources bent on keeping us divided. Both left AND right-wing sources are to blame and their agenda is the same and of the same bird; the true puppet masters who pull the strings. This is not a race war; this is a CLASS war and unless you are part of the 1% they are coming for you and me unless we all learn how to unite. Where are the #AllLivesMatter people when someone gets killed? Why aren’t we all marching together for justice? If #AllLivesMatter faux-activists every marched for justice for ALL, we could all join them! I don’t care what group you are in, if you are marching for humanity, you will find me right along with you.

            You seem like a good person. Maybe you can help me understand something. When injustice occurs, why does the same certain group of white people (who I believe to not be most white people) automatically feel the wrong type of guilt and get on the defense and end up defending the oppressors? They have so much power to help make the positive changes needed and march with us, but they spend all day long online defending oppressors? Then they tout #AllLivesMatter, as an opposition to defend the oppressors and are NO WHERE TO BE FOUND when injustice occurs even to white people? <–Where does the guilt-and-defense-mechanism come from?

          • JustWondering

            I know this is old, but thank you for pointing out the media’s hand in all of this. The media will encourage just about any form of conflict or negative information, if it meant better ratings. I dont trust them, and personally I don’t think anyone should.

          • Patrick Clark

            Thanks for the cordial reply, you can’t trust the media because they put out hyperbole and things that cause hysteria and panic. Anything that gets eyes on their news. They don’t fact check their information because they have to be first to disseminate the news, regardless of the validity or if it’s race baiting, or nonsense.

          • JustWondering

            Agreed. In regards to to the topic of “white privilege”, I agree with you. So many people forget that privilege (assuming we acknowledge it’s exists in the first place) is a very relative term. Ones privilege can change very quickly depending upon location, point in time, and social culture.

          • Patrick Clark

            I can’t speak for all white people, or any specific group of people, but I can tell you that when someone attacks you, or you feel attacked, you’re probably going to lash out or be defensive. That’s just human nature regardless of being right or wrong. As I said amd as you’ve obviously seen and heard, another black man was killed by police but if you look at the statistics, the number of blacks being shot is only a small percentage of the total shooting deaths. That means that the media only, or mainly broadcasts the black shootings so it appears that blacks are being targeted, or it’s only happening to blacks. That’s just not the case. I see where you are coming from but I guess we’ll have to agree to disagree on your assertion that blacks are being targeted. Otherwise I think we’re on the same page in terms of mist every other part of this. You’re obviously intelligent and have good ideas, it’s to bad that others couldn’t be as logical and sensible as you are. These police are out of control when it comes to dealing with high pressure situations and using their gun over their taser. I’m not a cop, so I can’t say what that’s like but I can say from my life situations and common sense that when it comes to making a life or death decision, you don’t have to reach for your gun unless it’s an absolute last resort.

      • Heather T

        “If I as a white person said I wasn’t going to tip any black server this same woman would call me racist.”

        But a lot of white people wouldn’t. And that’s not because what you said isn’t racist; it’s because a lot of white people are very invested in keeping themselves and each other from confronting their own racism. Racism is not just KKK riding around in white sheets; it’s embedded into the everyday fabric of our society; it’s normalized as everyday thought and action. So much so, that a threat against it is the same thing as a threat against ourselves…and our identity. Racism is **who we are**; if this were not so, we would not cling to it so tightly, so insistently, even as we insist that it’s not there. But it’s only by beginning to separate ourselves from it, that we can really start to see it. Let go. See what happens.

  • Tiffany Howes

    Funny how you delete and block any opinion that doesnt fall in line with your narrow minded agenda of soliciting donations while claiming to be an abused women. You are not oppressed, you are opressing others with your biogtry.

    • Bryan G. Graham

      Woosh.

    • Derp

      You’re just mad you got publicly dragged and outed for the racist that you are ?? good luck finding a new job.

      • ghost

        Her saying she as server refuses to wait on a person solely because they aren’t going to tip isn’t racist, saying you refuse to tip the opposite race just because they aren’t the same race is in fact racist though. Would this lady be okay with white people refusing to tip black servers? I highly doubt it, yet somehow its fine for her to not tip white servers. I honestly hope she just requests black servers when she goes out to eat to save the white servers the trouble of wasting their time for nothing.

        • Patrick Clark

          You’re basing this “fact” on what evidence? Someone with a criminal record regardless of color is going to have a hard time getting a job. It also depends on what the conviction was for. As for “white privilege”, I’m white and I haven’t seen 1iota if privilege in my life. If it exists, either im the not white enough or not rich. Only wealth affords privilege. There are wealthy black folks that are plenty privileged, a lot more than any privilege I supposedly have. It’s called “white privilege” so that means all whites should benefit from it. I’m still waiting.

          • ghost

            Can you walk down the street without women holding their purses tight or crossing the street? Can you drive around your community without being targeted by the cops? Can you walk through a store without the employees watching your every move? That is white privilege. In elementary school my niece, who is mixed, and I went into a dollar store to get candy and something for her mom. We weren’t in there for 4 minutes when the employee accused my niece of stealing a toothbrush, an aisle we were never by. My niece didn’t even touch anything when the person accused her of stealing. White privilege is real, you don’t have to be rich in order to benefit from it.

          • brook

            Are women more likely to clutch their purses when 4 black grandmas come out of church or 4 white males in their teens come sauntering down the sidewalk? Don’t conflate blatant racism/ sexism with valid observation. As the consequences for mistaken judgement go up, ie being murdered, attacked, robbed, people will be quicker to do something you might call racist. As a man who taught in public schools, I can attest to the suspicion that surrounds us when it comes too dealing with young females. Perhaps by slicing up demographics differently, we could show that “female privilege” is more apparent.

          • Patrick Clark

            Blacks account for around 13% of the population and are responsible for a large majority of the violent crimes. This isn’t some “study” done somewhere once, it’s actual, factual, statistical data amassed from FBI, and national crime statistics, etc. It can actually be verified. Stereotypes exists for a reason, they may be over-inflated, or exaggerated but nonetheless based on truth. Nobody should ever use the words all, or every when describing someone, but where do you think people’s ideas and conceptions of black people come from? So if a black guy is coming down the street, a woman might feel unsure of his intentions based on the information I have just stated. I get similar reactions on occasion because of the way I look. Even though I’m white, I’m muscular and covered in tattoos, I get profiled by cops, prejudged, and assertions are made. I don’t have a criminal record so that’s a prejudice based on my appearance alone. Stereotypes exist for all groups, blacks don’t tip, jews are cheap, white people only eat hot dogs and spathetti-o’s and smell like mayonnaise, etc. Yeah, they’re all ridiculous but there’s truth in them. I don’t eat hot dogs and spathetti-o’s anymore, and I’m fairly confident that I don’t smell like mayonnaise. I at least used to do one of the two.

      • Tiffany Howes

        wrong, I could care less. I dont depend on social media to pay my bills.

        • Heather T

          No. You’re just using it for a different kind of payoff.

        • Joshua A Smith

          Who the government?

    • Chloe Zafonte

      I find it sad how people are out to ruin lives over what is said online and not to their face. Just makes them look like cry babies, if they’re offended they can log off.

  • Mystery Carroll

    This is wonderful and a great eye opener. I had no idea it was this bad. I admire that your dragging the truth into light. The world needs more people like you.

    • ghost

      Not tipping a white server has nothing to do with white privilege. If I as a white person said I would refuse to tip black servers this same woman would call me racist. If anything its kind of a black privilege to be able to say these very blatant racist remarks and expect to not be called racist. White privilege is real, but white servers receiving tips from black customers is not white privilege.

      • Mystery Carroll

        This has nothing to do with her not tipping white servers, other than the title. It was just her provoking white people to show how some don’t care about black lives, just where there money is going.
        Also you should read some of her other posts to really understand where she’s comeing from.

        • Rook King

          Mehstry, do you feel guilty about being white? Do you hold it against people that they are white? If so, you judge people by the color of their skin. Is that an okay thing to do?

          • Mehstery

            Get to your point.

          • Rook King

            Is that yes or no?

    • Joshua A Smith

      Dragging the truth through the mud maybe.

  • brook

    what complete tripe. This is just grandstanding: deliberately provocative behavior that is just a stupid shock rather than anything that will not do anyone but the author any good. People may be members of any number of groups, and it is the bigot that cannot distinguish them as the individuals, they are.

    • Auntie Louise

      Interesting that you would be more offended by the discussion of peoples’ experiences with racism, than by the actual racism itself…

      • brook

        Interesting how quick you are to begin character assassination.

  • ghost

    At the restaurant I work at, which isn’t a small local one, it is a national chain, the servers can deny service to anyone as long as its not an issue based on race. We have an old white couple who requests a certain server everytime they come in. She recently refused to serve them because they don’t tip and are rude to her every time they come in.

    The lady this article is about is racist. To say you refuse to tip a server because of their skin color and not based on the service they provided is racist. If I as a white woman said I will not tip black servers she would deem me a racist, but because shes black its somehow fine for her to say she won’t tip white servers. Servers don’t “get paid to wait on you”, most of their money comes from tips, if they know you aren’t going to tip they shouldn’t and wouldn’t wait on you. Also, if you want to get rid of the stereotype that black people don’t tip, maybe not tipping your server is the wrong way to go about it. If she doesn’t want to tip her white server but still expects the same service they provide others then she should go to McDonald’s, they don’t expect tips there.

  • Patrick Clark

    Yeah, here’s the “white privilege” fallacy again. This bitch likes to say all white people have privilege rooted in white supremacy? This is as ignorant as saying all black people don’t tip. But, stereotypes exist for a reason, regardless of how large or small they are steeped in truth. Only wealth affords privilege, not the color of ones skin. And yes racism requires both prejudice and power, but black people have the ability to possess both. You don’t have to actually overpower someone for this to be true, you only have to believe that ypur race/ethnicity is superior, and blacks do have that ability. This bitch is wrong, confused, and ignorant, and someone gave her the platform to spew her verbal diarrhea? She sounds like she’s pretty privileged, to have a voice and a platform is a powerful thing. Not to mention dangerous depending on content and intention.

    • ghost

      White privilege is real, but white servers receiving tips from black customers has nothing to do with white privilege. The fact that a white man with a criminal record is more likely to be hired than a black man with a clean record is white privilege. White privilege is real but servers receiving tips has nothing to do with it.

      • Heather T

        …”white servers receiving tips from black customers has nothing to do with white privilege.”

        Maybe not, but white servers then turning around and telling everybody that “black customers don’t tip” – DOES.

        • Joshua A Smith

          They dont its just being honest.

    • Auntie Louise

      Your statement – in addition to being itself very contradictory – is full of overt sexism.

      So according to you: racism requires prejudice and power and black people can possess both if they just BELIEVE it? What fucking fairytale planet do you live on?

      • Joshua A Smith

        Wow you sound like Shillary

  • D Wee

    The woman that wrote this article is in complete denial of her racism. It is amusing that we live in the most diverse Nation in history and this woman does not think she’s racist. LMAO, notice that I did not bring up anyone’s “race” or “skin color” LMAO

    • Auntie Louise

      Living in a diverse society doesn’t eliminate racism. Living in a diverse society where multiculturalism is not truly embraced and where it is expected that everyone blend in with the dominant (white) culture – which ignores the many complex issues that non-whites face is #RACISM

      I do notice that you’ve managed to attribute racism to the author without mentioning the actual racism that people of colour experience daily.

      Mentioning that you didn’t bring up race or skin colour means that you actually DID bring it up.

      Dropping a few “LMAO”s into your ignorant comment doesn’t detract from the fact that you’re trying to deflect from the real issue.

      • D Wee

        The point of my comment is that white people are less racist than negros, latinos and asians. Just because you claim whites are racist does not make it a fact. How many racists voted for Barrack Obama? Answer: many

        • Cheryl Gafner

          Did you just say Negros? Wow! Now I’m LMAO!!! That term went out in the 70’s!

          • Joshua A Smith

            Dindu and Dinduess are the new terms.

  • Jack Ofalltrades

    All I can say is “damn” that was deep

    • Rook King

      Deep and stupid.

      • Joshua A Smith

        They were freed for this, remember that. I like Africans more honestly.

        • Rook King

          All generalizations are wrong, including this one. (I think Mark Twain said that.)

  • Tiffany Howes

    Well it seems Facebook agrees with ME ! “We reviewed the Page you reported for harassment. Since it violated our Community Standards, we removed it. Thanks for your report. We let Aysha Bee – Author know that their Page has been removed.”

    • Laura Diamodnstone

      Your profile was banned because you illegally snatched pictures. Not the 1st time it seems. We and law enforcement knows you spend your time trolling and threatening other people’s children.

      • Tiffany Howes

        Well you are wrong. I had to upload my ID and thats about it. I was not banned. Nor have I threatened anyones children. Nice try tho.

        • megerber

          And yet it is still gloriously up. Nice try.

  • Klarn Mxyzptlk

    Obviously, she understands that it is, indeed, a privilege to be Caucasian, and it is a curse to be anything else.

  • Chloe Zafonte

    Lmao ? I wrote ” I won’t give up my white privilege just because you’re butt hurt” with complete sarcasm. I love how she took it so personally. Hahahahahaha

    • Joshua A Smith

      You know you meant it.

  • Chloe Zafonte

    Hahahhaha my comment was complete sarcasm. I love how she took it so personally, I don’t even think white privelege exist. With that said I suppose haters make me famous ?

  • Kyle Kelly

    Thank you for posting this. I love your methodology to illicit a reaction. I often do similar things in conversation, saying something extreme to illicit an interesting response. Keep doing what you’re doing. I shared this on my fb wall to try to spread some knowledge.

    • Joshua A Smith

      Kind of like how saying the holocaust was a good start amiright?

  • Shane Henrik Lamminparras

    You are most certainly racist. You’re argument that you aren’t, because you can’t oppress a white person, is false. Not paying someone for services rendered because of the color of their skin is blatant oppression (unjust treatment). Welcome to racism!

  • Owen Thomas

    Sorry, “white privilege” isn’t a real thing, it’s wealthy privilege. The author is just so short-sighted she doesn’t grasp that, instead revelling in her own racism and self-righteousness. She has no idea what it’s like to be desperately poor.

    • Warrior KM

      “White Privilege” is not exclusive to financial status. Which is why your statement is false. I don’t agree with the author’s approach, though. Like AT ALL.

      • Heather T

        By its very definition, agitation is not designed to meet with anyone’s approval, but to act as a catalyst in bringing people together to discuss an issue; particularly an issue which is otherwise largely ignored. Agitation is an effective way to bring people out of their comfort zones, because getting too comfortable keeps things exactly as they are

        There are a LOT of people who neither agree with the author’s approach, **nor** her underlying message (nor, for that matter, do they even agree with the very fact of her existence) – but it ***brought them here*** nevertheless – and without having been agitated to do so, they’d never have come at all. If nothing else, they became part of the material from which some others of us could learn; an illustration, if you will, that racism is far from over and there is a lot left to be done.

    • Heather T

      One doesn’t have to be desperately poor to empathize with and advocate for those who are. I know what it’s like to be desperately poor – but I have no idea what it’s like to be desperately poor and black – or to be a black woman with a disability and desperately poor.

      But when I **was** desperately poor, I certainly didn’t try to play Oppression Olympics with the marginalized people around me. And in any event, I knew instinctively that being white still gave me an advantage that I didn’t ask for or earn.

      • Joshua A Smith

        You’re the type that would start yelling out that BLM line at a black protest, maybe you could start giving half your paycheck to the poor black people so you can feel better about yourself.

        • Heather T

          Re: “Maybe”:

          Well it doesn’t cost anybody anything to listen to voices not one’s own.

          • Joshua A Smith

            Re: “Idiot”:

            Im sorry what did you say. haha

        • Heather T

          Re: “Type”:

          This isn’t a bar, and you can’t size me up in 3 seconds, player. Talk to people. Get to know them a little bit instead of going out all half-cocked gunz-a-blazin’.

          • Joshua A Smith

            Yea but I JUST did so dont cry now.

          • Heather T

            Naw. You didn’t. And you’re not going to. Listen, don’t try and start using me for your evening’s entertainment because you’re *yawn* bored with all of life and need an interesting way to pass the time. You’re not the first nor the last troll to find me to be frightfully good company and an interesting conversationalist, but I work a demanding job assisting people in the disabled community and recently finished a triple-shift – and my time is more productively spent on recharging n’ whatnot. Find someone else to play with.

          • Joshua A Smith

            Its no not naw lol. Anyways the “yawn” comes from your diatribes on here. Your the one that likes playing with me 😉

          • Heather T

            Whut Joshua is still here after I politely declined his advances?! What totally new and original behavior is THIS?!

          • Joshua A Smith

            Be honest Heather, I know you like the BBC’s.

          • Heather T

            Wot? Are you kidding?! I LOVE British Television!

          • Joshua A Smith

            Ikr lol

          • Heather T

            Now please eff-off already and make yourself busy elsewhere. Other people need me.

          • Joshua A Smith

            Sure they do lol

          • Joshua A Smith

            You sound so triggered tonight Heather.

          • Heather T

            They only come out at night….

          • Joshua A Smith

            BBC lovers?

          • Heather T

            I think English telly wraps it up around 8 p.m. Along with the sidewalks.
            Listen, let’s stop disrespecting this space and what the author came to do, yeah? Peace.

          • Joshua A Smith

            Safe spaces don’t exist and the author is another race baiter with nothing constructive to say. It’s funny how you sjws always presume to tell others what to do and get mad when we don’t kowtow to your idiocy. Dueces.

          • Heather T

            Re: “Safe” space:
            Not trying to “make it safe” – that ship sailed long ago, at any rate.
            I’d like to suggest that neither of us derail the discussion at hand with our chit-chat.

            Perhaps, if you’d like, you can stalk – er, I mean “follow” me on Disqus and you can ambush me in a different discussion wherein we don’t cause such a disruption.

            Re: “Mad”: Don’t presume to somehow magically know whether, or how, I’m “feeling”.

  • 0bsoleteMan

    Wow… what kind of worthless jerk doesn’t tip when eating at a sit-down restaurant.

    People like that should stay home.

  • Daniel Alarcon

    Not being part of “white society”, I wouldnt know. But have you considered that its less that they dont want to listen to you talk about white privilege is because they dont want to listen to you at all, because you´re racist and a loathsome human being in general?

    • Heather T

      But I do know. And what I can tell you is that a lot of white ppl don’t even want to talk about the subject of white privilege with each **other** , let alone listen quietly and respectfully to an actual PoC.

  • Trae

    well its time to have that discussion you wanted to start. Lets compare the “microagressions” you speak of to the “macroagressions” blacks faced before the 60’s. Do you really think a white women touching a black woman’s hair is equivalent to getting dog’s set on you by the police? America still has improvements to make in regards to racism but we’re miles ahead of where we were. Now do you honestly think the best way to move forward is to piss off a bunch of white people with inflammatory statements like you made? Or were you just baiting to get attention? I know when I finished reading the article, it made me wonder if blacks and whites could ever live together and if maybe our differences are just irreconcilable. I know your statement probably had the same effect on many others. So the question you have to ask yourself is “Did my statement bring people together or did it just drive us further apart?”

    • Heather T

      Agitating for social justice is not “setting the dogs” on white people. The whole point of agitation is to generate attention. Some people came with the goal of confirmation bias. Others came to learn.

      • RacerX

        So you’re a racist too…

        • Heather T

          Of course I’m a racist. It is the heritage I was born with; same as you; same as all white ppl. I was born with my privilege – but at some point I was made aware of it and presented with the choice of whether to angrily deny it, or whether to unpack it and examine it.

          • Race Bannon

            You should go have animal sex with a total stranger. You need it…

          • Heather T

            As if you know what anyone needs. Get bent.

          • Race Bannon

            Seriously, you need to step away from the keyboard and go experience life. It’s an amazing world out there… Musing about your white privilege while sipping on lattes is no way to live… Good luck.

          • Heather T

            ” It’s an amazing world out there.” – Guy on Internet

            The hilarity continues…

        • Heather T

          To correct myself: Racism is not an inherent trait, however; it is a behavior in which we learn to engage in order to uphold both our own unearned privilege, and that of the system we are a part of.

          • Joshua A Smith

            Racism is a natural outgrowth to oppose multiculturalism and so-called diversity.

          • Heather T

            One cannot describe racism as “natural” by any objective means.

          • Joshua A Smith

            One as in only people who are infected with political correctness.

          • Heather T

            Re: “Political correctness”:
            One cancels one’s own argument when one uses the power of language in order to deny/dismiss that power.

          • Heather T

            If you, as many people do, value things like logic and objectivity to the point of giving them status as virtues, then please employ them, even while you examine the destructive beliefs to which you yourself subscribe.

          • Heather T

            And I say this because the attempt to establish just what is the precise nature of “man’s natural state”, has been an ongoing debate since forever. How do you separate yourself from the prejudices which were fed to you, when trying to establish this? There are many oppressors who have declared their oppression to be “natural” – and therefore “correct”.

          • Heather T

            Re: “Infected”: Racism is either “natural”, or it is not.

            Aside from the fact that you have not even established how to define “natural” in objective terms, it’s irrelevant here.

            Human beings fight all kinds of things which cause harm; whether they occur “naturally” or not.

  • Rook King

    So your customers who are black have black privilege in regard to your tips because white people can’t get them. That is one situation where black privilege does exist. Also, you are in fact a racist. The definition you go by is not the main one, and even by your definition, you are a racist. There is such thing as black people having power over white people. Admit it, racist.

  • jay

    We all need to sit down and have a discussion about the word “racism,” because it seems like people have gotten the word “racism” confused with a subset of racism known as “systemic racism.” Systemic racism is a type of racism and is just as valid and vile a form of racism as your old, run of the mill racism, in fact, its generally much worse because it functions on such a macro level and invades so many areas of our lives.

    All systemic racism is racism, however, not all racism is systemic. That is an important distinction to make, because people seem to have forgotten that and decided that all racism is systemic. When people say things like “reverse racism doesn’t exist,” or “Minorities cannot be racist because they’re not in the position of power,” those things are true, but only if they are referring to systemic racism. It is true, a black person by definition cannot be systemically racist towards a white person in America, because that is not how the system of oppression we are experiencing is set up. That doesn’t mean he or she cannot be straight up, old fashioned racist towards them. Again, all systemic racism is racism, however, not all racism is systemic.

    Aysha cannot be systemically racist towards her server because that would require her to reverse all systems of oppression in america, but she can absolutely be racist towards her server by discriminating against him based on his race. I get what she’s doing. Her point is valid and needs to be made. That being said, in this situation, she is literally in a position of power over her server on a MICRO level (distinct from a macro, systemic level) in that she determines how much he gets paid that night. That power allows her to be racist towards him if she wants to be.

    Again, her point is important and I apprehend her remarks about privilege. I just think the distinction between racism and systemic racism needs to be made and combatting systemic racism with regular racism does not seem to be an answer to anyones problems.

  • D Wee

    Yes, it’s like saying your knee grows, I was going to originally say negroid and mestizo’so but thought I would spare you since your probably a white liberal. Why did whites conquer the west? Because the Indians sided with the British. Who fought the British for our freedom? European Whites. If I was president where would I move the blacks? With the Jews in Beverly Hills and Manhattan.

  • Peggy Browning

    Blog on, Sister. Blog on. Thank you for this great post. Best wishes to you on continuing your insightful writing. 🙂

    • Joshua A Smith

      Typical response from someone with white guilt. ^^^

      • Patrick Clark

        And most likely a liberal, SJW.

  • Tanis Upton

    Honestly, I would be too afraid of not tipping an African-American. I might get mugged otherwise!

    • Joshua A Smith

      lol

  • I don’t want to argue about anything you have to say about race, but you realize that servers aren’t paid a living wage, and rely on tips to get by, right? You realize that in many restaurants, servers split their tips with kitchen staff, whose race you can’t know? And that sometimes, even if they aren’t tipped, they’re still required to pay out to kitchen staff and bussers as if they were? There’s a stereotype that black people don’t tip, and you clearly were targeted with a lot of racism here. But I don’t see how literally depriving waitstaff of a livelihood is going to help anything.

  • Heather T

    Ms. Bee proposes to exercise her right to withdraw her participation in a custom that is voluntary in nature, as a form of peaceful protest. Why is she not allowed this?

  • Heather T

    For White People Who Are Insisting They’re “Not A Racist”:

    I honestly want to ask:

    How did you come to that conclusion about yourself? Was there a semi/formal self-evaluation you performed – and if so, can you name the examples of your own behavior that helped you come to your conclusion? Is this a regular and ongoing self-evaluation, or a one-time thing? If the latter, when did this occur?

    • Joshua A Smith

      Yawn

  • zebedatious

    I think you should go further and, because of profit sharing, DEMAND a 1/30th discount for any major league baseball purchase, so that the White Sox may never receive any payment from your purchase. If you do choose to go further, and this I simply cannot condone, but when you visit a White House Black Market store, never set foot on the White House side. I salute your steadfastness and purpose, but I must warn you, pursue these forms of social disobedience at your own peril, the consequences could be disastrous!

  • KTB

    Hmm, interesting and thought provoking article. I am going to continue tipping all great servers regardless of skin color and treat others with the same respect I expect to receive. I don’t like the whole race baiting thing that’s been going on in the media. I will not ignore that there are racist issues and mistreatments still going on in our society but I WILL ignore media that tells me whites and blacks should have tension and hate towards each other. I will ignore messages that are fed to us, telling us we should treat each other differently, racism can turn into a vicious cycle, I refuse to participate in it.

  • Das Dabu

    If you treat someone differently because of their race, you ARE a racist. Play all the semantic games you want, you are a racist, YOU are denying people wages because of their skin color.

  • Joshua A Smith

    Black people complain wayyyyy to much. In general mind you, most actual black people are cool, its just the dindus that cry constantly.

  • RacerX

    This chick doesn’t even know the definition of racism, yet she wants you to muse over the deeper meaning of her juvenile exercise? Please….

  • Melissa

    lolll white people calm down. read the article. you can disagree with the means but the result is what is important and hard to deny. However, ike everyone’s opinion, there is obvious room for justifiable disagreement with this. The only real criticisms I can give about this is that it seems to be based on a white / black binary. For example, would you tip people of color that weren’t clearly black or white? Or what about people who identify with both white and a non-white background? What about people who could possibly pass as white, but are not by societal definition white? What if you went to a cafe in Kahnawake Mohawk territory? Would you not tip your server because they looked white even though they were actually Native and living on reserve? aka maybe passing as white but not really at all benefiting from white privilege? What about a Syrian refuge? Would you tip them? Many people from Syria would by visual definition be tagged as “white” but I hardly would say white americans consider them the same “white” that they consider themselves. And i hardly think they benefit from white privilege. What about someone from Iran? That’s the only problem i have with this; the binary that the whole world exists in either black or white and that prejudice, even without institutionalised racism, is something that is positive or something that is necessary to perpetuate in order to better society. I totally disagree with the anger and racism exhibited by a huge amount of white people that have read and commented on this post. At the same time if the end game is to eventually have white people accept and understand their privilege and actually stop perpetuating institutionalised racism, microagressions, and simply blatant racist and discrimination, then I don’t know how fully effective this could be to the majority of emotionally charged white people who are overly defensive because they feel they are being attacked. (at the same time, that sucks you feel attacked, but welcome to the world of POC since… like forever). BUT AGAIN: The more shame and anger felt by white people who havent yet come around or been adequately exposed to less aggressive discussions of “white privilege” the fewer white people who are going to actually one day be in a conceptual and emotional position to accept and personally change these things in their own lives.

  • Casper Flower is Love

    Its rude that people like you Ms Bee don’t tip people that actually perform their job regardless of race. I am a black woman and sounds like you have serious issues. Do yourself a favor and seek therapy my dear because you may have a mental illness.

  • Draych

    People sure do some dumb things just to look like they’re combating racism.

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